A Spring of Joy

I hate to be labeled…

I don’t tell people I like to watch super hero and science fiction because I don’t want to be labeled a geek.

I don’t like driving a mini-van because I don’t want to be labeled a soccer mom.

I don’t tell people I love pink and princesses and girly-girl things because I don’t want to be labeled a priss.

I don’t tell people I love sports because I don’t want to be labeled a tom boy.

I don’t tell people I love show tunes because I don’t want to be labeled a drama queen.

I don’t tell people I am for or against certain things politically because I don’t want to be labeled a radical or a liberal.

I don’t tell people I have real issues with certain behaviors or tv shows or movies because I don’t want to be labeled a legalist.

Instead, I often sit in silence, and when someone tells me they hate red, I just smile and keep to myself that red is my favorite color. Or when someone tells me all the things I “should do” with my house or my family or my health, I just smile and keep to myself that I already have plans for my house or my family or my health care.

I fear too much of what people may think… which is kind of crazy, considering I have a blog, and I share what I think (to a degree).

I’m tired. Being a people pleaser is tiring. I’m tired of hiding who I am because I fear what others may think. I am tired of finding little enjoyment in who I am because I get overwhelmed by strong personalities.

It’s idolatry. This people pleasing. This happiness rising and falling with the approval of others. I ask myself: Why? Why do I do this? Why do I care so much what others’ think? Why do I have this need for others’ approval when the approval belongs to one person:

Jesus Christ.

And so I am finding great liberty in being me. The me that He created me to be. And all I need to know is that I’m valued by Him. I only ask “Does Christ approve?” I know he approves of me as His child, but does He approve of what I’m saying and doing?

That is the label I want.

I want to be labeled a Christian. I want to be labeled as someone Who seeks Him first in all things. I want to be labeled as someone who is compassionate and kind and loving because of Him, not because of me.

Soli Deo Gloria.

To God Alone be Glory.

That is the label I want.