How Shall I Pray?

How shall I pray?
Are tears prayers, Lord?
Are screams prayers,
or groans
or sighs
or curses?
Can trembling hands be lifted to you,
or clenched fists
or the cold sweat that trickles down my back
or the cramps that knot my stomach?
Will you accept my prayers, Lord,
my real prayers,
rooted in the muck and mud and rock of my life,
and not just the pretty, cut-flower, gracefully arranged
bouquet of words?
Will you accept me, Lord,
as I really am,
messed up mixture of glory and grime?

(~Ted Loder, from Guerillas of Grace)

It is a struggle to breathe. A struggle to believe.

Will you pray for the peace that only the Spirit’s presence can give?

That I am accepted. Loved. His child. Not forgotten. Nor forsaken.

Completely and utterly His.

(Thank you to my Monica, who sent this prayer to me today.)

9 responses to “How Shall I Pray?”

  1. you guys have been so heavy on my heart today. Praying for peace & for the freedom to pray honestly, with all the hurts, the confusion, the anger, the sadness, etc… that swells in your heart. I may not know much…but I do know this – You are loved…so very much loved.

    “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Who will bring a charge against God’s elect? God is the one who justifies; who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?


    But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:31-39)

    Praying for you as often as I remember…and asking the Lord to keep you guys in the front of my brain.
    – DL


  2. I am praying for you Angie. For so many many things for you. For healing. For love. For peace.


  3. praying for you and your family this evening. My heart aches for you all and I have no words.

    praying believing,


  4. Beth Zarlenga Avatar
    Beth Zarlenga

    Praying fervently for this very thing for you dear precious friend. Love you so much.


  5. I love this prayer. God wants relationship with us, and what is relationship but vulnerability, realness, honesty.

    You are His. You are held. You are loved.

    Praying for peace that transcends the fear.


  6. “Jesus Draw Me Ever Nearer”
    Music by Keith Getty; Words by Margaret Becker
    Copyright © 2002 Thankyou Music

    Jesus draw me ever nearer
    As I labour through the storm.
    You have called me to this passage,
    and I’ll follow, though I’m worn.

    May this journey bring a blessing,
    May I rise on wings of faith;
    And at the end of my heart’s testing,
    With Your likeness let me wake.

    Jesus guide me through the tempest;
    Keep my spirit staid and sure.
    When the midnight meets the morning,
    Let me love You even more.

    Let the treasures of the trial
    Form within me as I go –
    And at the end of this long passage,
    Let me leave them at Your throne.


  7. You are loved!


  8. The rawness of this prayer is so real! I even uttered a few of my own today on your behalf. Real. Honest. Raw.

    Thankful and confident that He does accept, hear and even love us in our “messed up mixture of glory and grime”.

    In fact, I often wonder if that isn’t where the real heart work of faith, trust, and healing begins? Completely laid bare before Him, and fully embraced in that place…mess that it is.



  9. I love this prayer. I think all these things are received by our Father who loves us beyond our understanding and accepts us in Jesus. We’re praying all during days and nights for you, for you to know you’re wrapped in His love…and now, for you to know joy and “outrageous grace.”


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