A Spring of Joy

Oh, y’all. Honestly, it is hard to find beauty these days, when I (and so many of the people I love) are walking in the brokenness of a fallen world. The tag line of this blog is “glimpses of our world.” We rely on His grace and His strength to get us through. Day by day. Hour by hour.

Here’s a peak into one day. Another glimpse into our world. One ordinary day.

{6:45 a.m.} Waking to find our front door had blown open in the night, and steaming mugs of coffee to warm me and remind me of my calling to love.

{7:30 a.m.} Writing notes on napkins and giggling over silly puns. She calls me Marmee (from one of our favorite reads, Little Women). There’s no describing how much I love that!

{8:30 a.m.} I’ve updated the shower curtain in our upstairs bathroom where our laundry is, and every time I see it, it brings me a smile. And laundry. Lots and lots of laundry. Laundry is my favorite task. I love to pray over my family as I fold. I have a deal with my children—during the school year, because I stay at home and have time, I do their laundry; however, they put it away. And if I hear complaints, they get to do their own laundry. See all those beautiful colored hangers? I love them! Each kid has a different color for their clothes, so I know whose is whose. (Bella is red, Ash is blue, Bear is grey/black… yes, I know I’m OCD)

{9:30 a.m.} It has been six years since my dear friend, Kim, passed from life here to life eternal. I still pick up my phone to call her some days, and then I remember she’s gone. It is a deep ache in my heart. And worship, seeing the beauty of Jesus, helps heal.

{10:30 a.m.) Cancer center. I made a friend in the therapy dog, and he was sweet and cozy and comforting as I waited to see the oncologist. My counts are better but still low, and I continue to be neutropenic. I will stay off one of my medications for another week and see her again. My heart is sad to think of things this weekend I will miss, but I’m thankful for small steps forward in figuring out what’s best tolerated by my body.

{12:00 p.m.} Leaving the cancer center. Mennonite hats hanging on the racks. It struck me. I’m not sure I can articulate why.

{1:00 p.m.} A heated throw and my own therapy pup curling up with me while I read.

{2:00 p.m.} Driving back to the cancer center for an infusion. I go every three weeks for this, and it does not impact my blood counts. Sweet reminders from my girl that I keep in my car… and beautiful clouds as I walked to the doors. It reminded me of these words from a favorite hymn, “The clouds you so much dread are big with mercy and shall break in blessings on your head.”

{3:00 p.m.} The view from my chair. Thankfully, the seats are heated and I curl up with my Kindle and warm blankets and a pillow. I laugh with the nurses and show them pictures of my family, and we catch up. Ten years of this, these nurses have become friends to me.

{4:00 p.m.} As I left the center, I passed a friend who was receiving her treatment and we caught up for a few moments. We cried together as we shared the pain of walking with Stage IV cancer. And we cried some more as we struggled to encourage each other when the day-in, day-out of life feels hopeless. We know the ultimate hope will not disappoint! As I left, the clouds had blown away and I caught my breath at the clear blue of the sky and fire of the trees. Even that felt like a glimpse of hope.

{5:30 p.m.} My children were home when I arrived home to curl up on the couch and nap again, already nauseated by treatment. Bella girl worked on her pre-algebra, and Bear stepped in to help explain to her how to make sense of it all. I love watching my children just “be” together. They really do have a bond… all three of them. It is a sweet gift to my mama heart.

{6:30 p.m.} Taking a break to laugh at the antics of Shawn and Gus. We had a quiet evening with nowhere for any of us to go, and spent some time with one of our favorite shows. I love hearing the laughter of my Bri and my children—-Ash and Bri laugh so heartily, Bear just shakes his head and snickers, and Bella giggles with those sparkling eyes. I think I do all three, but mostly, I just revel in being with them and watching them.

{8:00 p.m.} As I headed off to bed, Bella girl was showing us her photography project. Always looking for a creative outlet, she took Bri’s camera on Saturday and spent the afternoon outside walking our yard, setting up photo shoots and chattering to the pups and the horses and the butterflies all around. Bear helped her edit them, and here is one of my favs. It’s one of my Holly Hobby dolls from childhood.

Yes, y’all. It is hard to find beauty these days, when I (and so many of the people I love) are walking in the brokenness of a fallen world. But here it is. Glimpses of a simple day. The extraordinary ordinary. Gifts from the hand of a loving Father, who knows this feeble frame.

There is hope beyond the horizon.

(The idea for this blog was inspired by instagram’s #onedayhh)