A Spring of Joy

I turn the thin pages of Nona’s diary. I like that I can’t read it. This way, the story will change and change. I find places where she underlined, places where it looks like tears fell on a page. The diary whispers and whispers, and sighs and sighs…

That is where my writing is these days… whispers, sighs and tears on the pages of my red leather bound journal. The darkness of depression moves me to write, but not here.

…and then, on one page, yells out loud. It is huge writing, just three words but they are happy. You can tell, the writing is happy.

(From Elizabeth Berg’s “Joy School”)

Longing for huge words to write.

…and deliciously MIA for a week at the beach.

Yesterday was a day.

Picture this if you like…

I was weary from a visit to the oncologist. It was a good visit. I am staying in maintenance mode… my white blood cell counts and iron continue to be low, which means I have a weak immune defense and next visit I will have to have an iron infusion, because we can’t seem to get my iron levels back up. Not fun, but a whole lot better than chemo! It also explains the extreme fatigue I have on top of just normal recovery from treatment.

I picked up my kids and off we went to Wally-World (do you even want to know how many times under my breath I say, “I hate this store.” every time I am in that place? Why, oh why do I torture myself?). We arrived under threatening skies, and just as we pulled into our parking space, the rain began. We waited until it slowed, played a bit of I Spy, pretended we were invisible super heroes, then ran for it when the rain slowed.

I had a bag of things to return and wound up waiting behind someone who had at least 30 items (I do not kid!) to return. The hour I had planned at this cursed place was already half over by this point, but I pressed forward. We did our shopping (last minute for our beach trip next week), and checked out only to find that not only had the skies opened up, but the downpour was blinding. We stood and waited and waited and waited. Three small children and one tired adult. Finally, it let up. Sprinkles. So we ran for the van again.

Two steps into the parking lot and that torrential downpour I mentioned before? It decided to start again. We got to the van. Bella was screaming her head off. Bear kept saying we should have taken an umbrella. And Buddy, well, he was a good buddy and helped me get everyone in the car as well as the bags. By the time I got into the van, I didn’t have a single dry spot on me. It was like I had jumped into a pool… the kids were just as wet and miserable.

And Bella continued to scream. “My shoe! My shoe! My shoe!” It had fallen off in the melee. So, we located it and waited for the rain to subside. Y’all I was wringing out my hair (to which my dear friend, Bethy, responded with how happy it made her that I had hair to wring out. That means it’s getting long. Yay!) Rain stopped. Shoe acquired.

We began our trek home. I turned out of the parking lot and the van froze up. No power steering. Nothing. I wanted to bang my head against the steering wheel. I called my B, who was out of town on business, and said, “The serpentine belt went again on the van. What do I do?” Aren’t y’all impressed that I even know what a serpentine belt is? Ahh, yes, I fancy myself a mechanic.

Not really. I like to keep my nails clean.

He figured we lived close enough to the cursed Wal-Mart to get home but I’d have no power steering. Alas, I also have no strength in my right arm b/c of my surgeries. So, he told me to call Guest Blogger Joe, because well, if you’re looking for arm strength AND a mechanic, he’s the one to go to. Well, not the mechanic part. So I called Guest Blogger Joe who rescued our little family. He drove the van home, while I drove his car.

Side note:

When Joe got to us, he moved Bella into his car so she could be with me while I drove home. That part didn’t get communicated to poor Bella. As he was strapping her car seat in, she was super quiet, so he looked up only to find her face crumpled in tears in that terrifying no breathe cry kids do when they are upset. It was heart-breaking. We calmed her down and explained she was going to be with Mommy. I think she had had her fill. As had I.

We got home, broken van, soggy groceries, drenched children, cranky mommy. We dried off, baked a pizza, curled up in front of a movie, and Bella can’t stop singing the praises of Guest Blogger Joe. Guess he’s her hero now. Bear decided we should give him food to thank him.

Two more side notes:

First, in all that time I sat with my hazards on, pitifully wet, a broken van on the side of the Wally-World parking lot, at least 50 cars passed me. And not one stopped to see if I needed help. That makes me very sad. Very, very sad. That’s the world we live in today.

Second, now I get to drive the TRUCK everywhere. Can y’all tell I am just so excited? I even had my arm out the window like a true redneck today. Mind you, I have nothing against rednecks. I just am about the farthest thing from one as you can get.

So, there… if you’ve made it this far without getting bored, good for you.

That’s all.

Happy Wednesday.

Oh, and that beach trip we’re going on? Can’t get here soon enough!